On Tuesday I had back to back meetings most of the day between 2 locations. A busy day. I had my phone with me and told everyone in the meetings if they heard drums I would have to excuse myself. At the 1pm meeting I held the phone in my hand in case it rang so I wouldn't disrupt the presentation. The meeting ran long. When it was over, I left the conference room and my cell voicemail light went on. I wondered how I could have voicemail if the phone never rang. I checked the call log and saw 2 MISSED CALLS FROM JULIE SALWASSER. MISSED calls?? No! Then I listened to the voicemail and it was from Julie AND Dodd. "Hi Rebecca, this is Julie. I'm on the line with Dodd and we are trying to get a hold of you." I ran back to my desk. Voicemail this time on my desk phone as well as email from Julie looking for me.
Wouldn't you know it, for the most important call of our lives, I was in the one area of the 1 million square foot building with no cell phone coverage. Yes, *I* missed The Call. Three times. And Dodd was Johnny on the Spot. Time for humble pie.
I called Dodd first. His first question was of course, "Where have you been??" I said I KNOW!! Now tell me about him!! But my dear husband didn't let Julie tell him anything without me on the phone. Jeez I love this man. So we called her together and got...voicemail. Called again, voicemail. I called the AGCI receptionist who told me Julie went to lunch and would be back in about 45 minutes. Lunch? Argh! Poor girl can't even go to lunch without crazed parents tracking her down. Dodd then told me he would be in a meeting and we would have to wait an additional 15 minutes after Julie returned to call her.
For the next hour, I didn't know what to do with myself. I told a couple close friends at work and emailed my parents what was going on. I also emailed my coworker to let him know I would have to cancel our afternoon meetings and let him know I was getting a little nutty. He said, so basically your water broke and you can't find the doctor? Precisely!
When 3:30 finally came and Dodd called me, we called Julie again, and got...voicemail. So I called the AGCI receptionist again who transferred us right in to Julie. She was on another call but was kind enough to put us on hold until she finished so we wouldn't have to hang up.
Then she came on the line to tell us about...him. The little one we have waited so long to know. She proceeded to walk us through all the known information. His birthdate, where he was born, his height and weight, when he arrived at Hannah's Hope, his birth family, his ethnic group, his family religion, his medical report, his lab results. I was strangely calm while she talked. That guarded heart of mine was faithfully on duty.
One thing I would like to share with those of you waiting for your call, if it can help you prepare. It's both joyful and painful. It's the paradox of adoption we were told to expect, but actually coming face to face with it was something different. At that moment on Tuesday, we were becoming part of his future. But in order for us to be part of his future, there was struggle and loss that had to come before. As our little guy was becoming a real person to us through Julie's words, so was his story. And his story, what little we know of it, is hard. It was one of the most joyful moments of our lives. And it hurt. It was a lot to take in.
After Julie shared all of his information, she told us she would send an email which would contain a lot of photos. Dodd and I had previously committed to taking a required class that night, so we agreed to meet at the class early to look at his photos together. When we were finally together about an hour later, we fired up the laptop, locked hands, took a deep breath, and opened the first photo. There he was. Him. Our future. Our heart. Our son. For the next hour we poured over the photos, looking at his hands, his feet, his legs, his eyes, oh those eyes, the shape of his face, his nose, his gummy grin, his fists. There were also a few of his sneer. Do babies sneer? This is a real Billy Idol, Rebel Yell kind of sneer. Let me tell ya, this little guy has attitude. If a few pictures of an 8 week old can be any indication, he's going to give us a run for our money. And he's beautiful. Amazing really.
Then the teacher arrived, and we had to sit through an infant care class with several pregnant women and their husbands. We kept his picture on the laptop in front of us. I wanted to leave in the worst way. I wanted to tell them we just had a baby. The only class info I remember is "call the doctor if baby's temp is 100.4 or higher." That class lasted 2 excrutiating hours! So we had to wait to call our families until we got home after 9pm. I realized my poor parents had to wait all day to hear about their first grandchild. I am sorry guys!
It was after we arrived home, wonderfully exhausted, that we noticed God had provided us with a sign that this boy is meant to be ours. But I will save that for the next post!
Oh WOW!!!! Ups and down of that story, there are so many things that touched my heart and I wanted to scream evertime you said "voicemail" I cant wait to read your next post "the sign?!?" And your poor parents, first time grandparents,how could they stand not hearing from you? If they're anything like my parents (also 1st time grandparents to be) they would have called Julie themselves.
ReplyDeleteIve never thought about the sadness of hearing our child's story, my mind just hasnt gone there yet, thank you for sharing that aspect. Until now I have only processed the excitement and shock of knowing that my husband is going along with this.
COngrats x1000!!
My heart is beaming for you!
Your post brought tears to my eyes, how excited it is to be parents. I can't even tell you how excited I am to hear about your addition to YOUR(our) FAMILY =). Both your parents and mine(Amy's little one) are 1st time grandparents around the same time. I can't wait to hear about when you get to see him in person and when he gets to come home to see that precious tree you planted outside his bedroom window. What a special boy who gets to live with 2 extremely special people. I will be praying for you guys as you wait the arrival of your son.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful story... That's really all I can say. I'm so happy for you both. I was thinking tonight about how adoption stories are full of loss and heartbreak, yes, but also fully of hope, bravery, love, and, of course, family! And I cannot wait to see a picture of your whole family! Take care and enjoy being a mama (even if your son happens to be 7000 miles away right now-- but not for long!).
ReplyDeleteCan't wait to hear more!!! So thrilled for you both!!!!!! Yeah!!!
ReplyDeletePS-- Do you REALLY think we'll get our "call" next Thursday?? I am praying you're right!!
ReplyDeleteM
Love your call story!!!! At least you didn't hang up on Julie like I did. And I know exactly what you mean by being joyful and sad. It's hard but wonderful and that is tough to sort through sometimes. But, congratulations on his wonderful new future with you guys and your many blessings that lie ahead with him!
ReplyDeleteYou sure know how to keep me checking your blog every minute of the day!!! LOL. Love the call story!!! What a long, long day of waiting and wondering! I can't wait to hear the rest of the story.
ReplyDeleteYEAH!!!!! A little baby boy! Oh my word.....I loved your description of hearing about him for the first time. It's true....such a mixture of joy and a little sorrow. That is what I felt as well. So happy for you. Hope you had a blessed weekend!
ReplyDeleteMelissa
YAY! I'm so glad I stumbled on your blog from the listserve! We're new in the process (just in since August) and I love reading posts like yours!!! I was hanging on EVERY word! And what a fun writer you are! And I must also add...I just love your heart. We have a school in Africa and unfortunately we know the loss part way too well. The hard part of adoption is what I'm most fearful of hearing at that call...but I know there will be so much joy in it as well. What a beautiful life you and your husband are going to give this baby boy...can't wait to see the rest of your story!
ReplyDeleteWoo Hoo Congratulations!
ReplyDeleteI just found your blog through my tracker and how do I not know you?
Matthew was almost 8 weeks when we received his referral. It's wonderful.
congratulations!!! i love the call story!!! sorry i am just now commenting...havent really been keeping up with the blogs this past week :) I am really excited for you guys!
ReplyDeleteThat was us on the call! My husband was the one who made the comment about the ladies doing the laundry and the men watching the game. He made many more comments through the call and I was nervous the whole time that our mute button would suddenly stop working and everyone would hear his crazy comments:)
ReplyDeleteCongrats on your baby boy!!! Maybe we'll travel together? Your blog's really fun. It's making me want to spend some time on mine. Sorry, I'm rambling....